About Me

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Self-published author with 3 books out there dealing with the darker side of life through poetry, short stories, observations and sketches. 'Love or Suicide and the Life In-between', 'this heat, it's hell closing in on me' and 'Words to be performed from under a table by the last of us'. Can't live without music (heavy metal and soundtrack's especially), film buff (sci-fi floats my boat), anime watcher (old school mainly), book reader (anything that captures my interest), gamer (PS4/Xbox-One), gym pumper and all round geek.

Sunday, 12 July 2015

There are moments...

...in life that define us.  Moments that remain fixed in our being until the day we die, moments that define what we are, what we like and what we want.  They can range from experiences, people we meet, jobs we have, heartaches and failures, successes and love, pets, films, books...the list goes on.  For me, there are many moments that define me.  Mostly made up of experiences and actions but there are also many to do with music.  My first ever gig was in 1996 and it was Marilyn Manson on the Antichrist Superstar tour and it opened the flood gates to the many other gigs I have seen since.  The greatest gig I have ever seen was Roger Waters playing The Wall at Manchester...a spectacle, musically and visually, which has yet to be beaten.  The first time I heard Queen's final album Made In Heaven, the moment I completely related to Nine Inch Nails masterpiece The Downward Spiral, the time I saw the music video for Killing Joke's Millenium which played over and over as I battled an all nighter trying to finish my Art coursework, the mind blowing experience that was Ozzfest and all that goes with a festival...all moments that I will happily take to the grave.  But there is one moment that completely re-defined what music is to me today...the moment I heard Fear Factory's Demanufacture.

Up until I heard that album, Heavy Metal was something I just wasn't into!  It was around, it was in the background, it was there...but always in the distance.  Then I heard the song Replica!!!  It blew my mind, it was heavy as shit but also melodic.  The music was brutal but also strangely beautiful.  How is this possible I thought...what is the trickery...is that keyboards I can hear????  Yes, Demanufactue is still the perfect example of using keyboards on an album full of heavy crushing guitars, pounding drums, throbbing bass lines and vocals that would rip you to pieces!!  Ah yes, the vocals...Burton C Bell could roar his way to hell and back then serenade you up to heaven...again, something which has rarely been pulled off (Devin Townsend equalling Burton's power).  Then there was the collision of metallic coldness and almost robotic goings on mixed in as well as amazing lyrics and artwork...this was a band at its absolute peak in every aspect!!!  From start to finish, it is an absolute masterpiece and still sounds as fresh and powerful as it reaches the grand old age of 20!  It is the one album that turned me into a fan of Heavy Metal and opened up my world of music for the better...and heavier!!

But why, you ask, am I barking on about this now?  Well, 2 days ago, 2 tickets were ordered and paid for to see the mighty Fear Factory in December (this will be the 7th time seeing them) where they will play the entire album in full...THE ENTIRE FUCKING ALBUM!!!!  So, 20 years ago, my life was changed because an album managed to re-define my entire taste in music...now, 20 years later, I get to experience that album played live in full by one of my all time favourite bands.  That is some special shit!!!


Saturday, 20 June 2015

It's nearing the end...

...of June meaning we are now entering the run of good weather and the longest day. This has also meant lots of gardening and time outside...I spent hours last Saturday just sat in the middle of the garden reading a book. Being sad as I am, this has also meant lots of photos being taken:


I know, I know but sometimes I just can't help myself!! Other things going on...went to see The Producers at the Liverpool Empire which starred Ross Noble and Jason Mansford. It was excellent!!! Funny, great script, brilliant music and an enjoyable day out. Seen a couple of this years big films in Avengers Age Of Ultron and Mad Max Fury Road...Mad Max being the absolute kick ass mind blowing eye popping film I have been waiting for since Beyond Thunderdome!!! Exciting music news for this year sees new releases from Ghost, Fear Factory, Slayer, Cradle Of Filth and Iron Maiden. The new Faith No More album released last month is an absolute genius piece of music!!

I have finished the first draft of my script 'Berlin' (see previous blogs) and whilst I have stayed true to the Lou Reed album it is based on (for the first half anyway), the second half has seen me create a sort of vigilante character called Silent who I am now interested in having him star in my next book. Always wanted to write a vigilante/avenging angel/superhero type story and it now looks like I have found my character!!!

Anyway, down to business! Yes, I am here shamelessly plugging my first book 'Love or Suicide and the Life Inbetween' available to buy at Amazon.co.uk for a very reasonable £6.99. All the profit I were to make is donated to The Samaritans so please log on to Amazon and purchase my book!



Sunday, 10 May 2015

A little bit of this...

...a little bit of that, so they say.  So after an amazing time away in London, life quickly slots back into its routine.  So, I thought I would do something a bit different for May...I have made a list of 20 things I want to do with the month.  All are very achievable and all are very beneficial to what could lay ahead. 
For example: JOB HUNTING, FINISH QUAKE 4, TRIP TO MARTIN MERE, DEDICATED GYM etc.  The one which has re-energised my writing though is: RE-START BERLIN SCRIPT.


Lou Reed's 'Berlin' album is one of the greatest, harshest, vivid, beautiful, haunting albums EVER!!  It was written in direct response to the commercial success of the album 'Transformer' which contained the hits Walk On The Wild Side, Satellite Of Love and Perfect Day, and is fuelled by that albums success and the need to create the flip side of it.  It's 2 main characters, Jim and Caroline, are tragic and sorry figures and the album takes us through their lives and the world they live in.  It is stunning in its story, its gorgeous in its music and its brave in its subject matter...an absolute classic that really needs to be heard.


Anyway, it is one of my favourites and I have always wondered what it would be like as an actual book.  First I discussed turning it into a graphic novel with a friend but that idea fizzled out so I thought, why not turn it into a script?  So I have.  I have scripted the entire album and then some because there is a point in the story where Caroline has her children taken away and I thought about their story so decided to continue the script and create a new original story focused around the children.  Roughly around half way through at this stage, I have pushed my own limits in storytelling by delving into the darkest corners of what can happen to children and the depraved actions of some adults trusted with the care of such children.


So, as a little teaser, I have attached parts of my script to Berlin and beyond:


Act Seven


Bare, let the actions tell the story
Jim finishes his attack and slumps down in the corner, his vision returning to normal.  We now focus on Caroline who gets up off the floor. We see the hotel room dissolve into a snow landscape, but with the furniture still there, all brilliant white, Caroline’s breath visible, Jim’s not.  When Caroline puts her hand through the windowpane and we see blood, it drips onto the snow and we slowly fade back into the hotel room.


Caroline
‘Why is it that you beat me, it isn’t any fun’


She slowly moves over to a dressing table, which has a mirror on it and we watch as she begins to make up her eye.


Caroline
‘You ought to learn more about yourself, think more than just I’


She stands up and walks over to Jim who is still slumped in the corner.  She then reaches into his pocket and finds the tablets of speed he took just as he retaliates and pushes her over before banging the back of his head on the wall repeatedly a few times.  Again Caroline gets up off the floor.


Caroline
‘You can hit me all you want, but I don’t love you anymore’


She bites her lip and moves over to the window.


Caroline
‘Life is meant to be more than this, and this is a bum trip’


She takes the tablet of speed munching on it and we hear whispers of voices asking ‘what is in her mind?’.  Caroline suddenly laughs and puts her hand through the windowpane.




ACT ONE
We open in a wonderful universe.  Stars, planets, explosions, comets, black holes – a wondrous scene is taking place and we are being pulled backwards through it.  We slow down, we speed up, supernovas decimate the screen, and intense fire rips through this galaxy.  We pull back and come out of a human eye and linger on it as tears stream out of it.  We slowly pull back some more and see a young girl Chloe(under 20) sat on the floor.  She is holding a razor at her wrists and staring directly at us.  We see on the wall behind her, 2 painted wings either side of her shoulders and begin to pan around the room she is in.  Everything is smashed, destroyed, books are on the floor, posters are ripped and the bed covers are on fire.  The door to this room is full of locks and padlocks and bolts – most of which have been battered and are swinging loose.  The scene is just pure chaos as we finish panning all the way around and end up back facing this young girl.  We move very slowly towards her again until all we can see is her face and shoulders – everything is silent and suddenly still.  She makes a slight move with her shoulders and a spray of blood shoots up and strikes her face.


Everything fades out apart from the spray of blood which just crawls and morphs into more streaming tears coming from Chloe but 10 years younger as she is being carried off, arms stretched out towards us and screaming ‘Mummy’ as loud as possible.  We pull back to see her mummy being held back by a man in a suit as she desperately tries to break free and get to her children as we can now see a young boy being carried off as well.  We move round to behind mummy and watch as the children are taken out of sight, we can hear the man in the suit screaming for Caroline to calm down.  Caroline continues to struggle as she focuses her anger on a man curled up in the corner screaming for Jim to do something.  The children disappear behind a slammed door which stops the entire scene entirely…before Caroline screams at the top of her voice ‘NO!!’


We are now outside as the children are put into separate vans, their little faces pressed up to the windows of the vans facing each other, tears still streaming, fists banging on the glass the 2 vans drive off and go opposite ways.



Saturday, 18 April 2015

London...

...so, start of this week I was at London with Michelle for a few days.  The main reason was to see the mighty Devin Townsend Project at The Royal Albert Hall but we then decided to make a few days away and do the London rounds: Museums, London Eye, Thames cruise etc.


First off, The Devin Townsend Project was simply stunning!  A night to remember as the first set was the entire Z2 Dark Matters album played in full and turned into a show of sorts which included several big screens moving the story along, a giant ball bag with eyes running around on stage (really!), men firing merchandise from air powered bazookas, Chris Jericho popping up on screen as Captain Spectacular and Devin and the band supported by the gorgeous War Princess herself Dominique Lenore Persi playing a faultless set.  Amazing on its own but then after a 20 minute interlude, out the band come and play a "by request" set of tracks from his entire catalogue and including songs I have never heard live before (this is my 4th time seeing him), some of which blew my face off - Earth Day and The Death Of Music especially!  To say it was special is an understatement.  To say it was a unique one off doesn't even come close.  It will be something that will live with me forever and was 3 hours worth of my life which will remain an absolute highlight.


Then we come to London itself...our capital!  Impressive is a word I would use.  Busy is another word I would use. 


We went to the 2 main museums...History and British.  For me, the History museum is the better...full of dinosaur bones and displays of us and our place on this planet, it really blew me away.  We went on the London Eye which was a lot higher than I expected and I spent the majority of the 30-40 minute trip pretty much shitting myself...but the view was absolutely worth it (the skies were cloud free) as you could see for miles.  Similarly worth it was the Thames boat trip which meant we could see, and pass, all the main attractions of London.


Our Hotel was literally just outside Kensington Gardens which was stunning.  The Underground was easy and not as hellish as I had been led to believe.  The food we had was spot on...room service, eating pizza after midnight is always amazing!!  All in all, I couldn't find fault and overall, for the time we were away, we crammed in so much and enjoyed every moment of it.