About Me
- James S M Parker
- Self-published author with 3 books out there dealing with the darker side of life through poetry, short stories, observations and sketches. 'Love or Suicide and the Life In-between', 'this heat, it's hell closing in on me' and 'Words to be performed from under a table by the last of us'. Can't live without music (heavy metal and soundtrack's especially), film buff (sci-fi floats my boat), anime watcher (old school mainly), book reader (anything that captures my interest), gamer (PS4/Xbox-One), gym pumper and all round geek.
Monday, 27 August 2012
And so it ends...
...my 'glorious' 2 week shut down is now on it's last day. As they say, all good things must come to an end - well, not a complete end - there is always next year, Christmas and the last few days holiday I have booked off for various concerts. Anyways, our last week of shut down was spent in Scotland. More accurately, we had a 5 day break in the Macdonald Cardrona Hotel - Golf and Spa. We had 2 days of golf booked as well as back massages, use of the pool, steam room and sauna and a trip into the village of Peebles. The rest of our time would be spent chilling out, nipping out for walks and just generally forgetting about work and everyday life for a few days.


So, was it any good? It was amazing. The golf course was brilliant. Challenging, long, tricky, rewarding and well looked after. We did get wet on both days and the course was waterlogged in places, but, the views from EVERY SINGLE hole made up for any bad weather we had. Did we play well? We did OK - lets just leave it at that!!! The back massage was, put simply, heavenly. I do have a twingy back, especially at the bottom, so it did slightly hurt the odd time - but otherwise it was divine. The pool, steam room and sauna were just 'ok'. They did their job and it was nice to go for a swim after golf and the back massage. Peebles wasn't too bad either - not much there but enough to spend a few hours (even if we got wet there as well). The hotel was very good. Clean, nice staff, good facilities - very good. The bed especially felt like a massive cloud and was a pleasure to sleep in. We had 2 breakfasts and 3 evening meals and they too were faultless. It was the first time I had tried Venison, Haggis Scotch Egg and Dauphinoise Potatoes and they were delicious - like I said 'faultless'!! Even the 3 hour 30 minute drive was littered with amazing views, especially the final 30 miles - stunning!! So, overall, an amazing holiday and one that me and my girlfriend thoroughly enjoyed (as you can see from these photos).
Wednesday, 15 August 2012
Oh, glorious shutdown...
...glorious, glorious shutdown. The company I work for has a 2 week shutdown every year and it is always something I really look forward to. Even more so this year because I had to work the first week (last week) but get the following 2 weeks off - plus the extra day which is bank holiday Monday!!
I plan lots of writing, gaming, gyming, sorting out, reading etc for these 2 weeks and I gotta admit, it has been a great start. Today is Wednesday - the 3rd day of my first week of this glorious shutdown...and so far I have managed to look at future writing projects and already begin to gather and start them. I have upped my promotion of my self published book, 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between' by sending a couple of copies out - one to The Samaritans and one to The Writing Magazine. Really looked at my Twitter and Blogger friends and streamlined/added to focus on Authors and like-minded people. I am happily gaming and gyming away - playing Rage on the PS3 and Splinter Cell Conviction on the X-Box whilst spending my early mornings kicking ass in the gym. I am just about to finish a book I have been given by the Managing Director of the company I work for to read, before I start on Fifty Shades Darker - yes, even I have been caught up in all this Fifty Shades bollocks. Gotta say, I have never hated, loved, been intrigued, wanted to burn, sympathised, been shocked, couldn't put down - a book as much as I have with Fifty Shades Of Grey!!! So, like I said - it has been a great start!!
So, a quick teaser for my future projects. At the moment I have 4 on the go (which includes 'Love or Suicide...'), they all follow the same sort of feel and look. The 4 projects are:
1. 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between'
2. 'Life and Death'
3. 'Sex'
4. 'Oh Such Sweet Words' (work in progress title)
The first 3 are my "Existence" trilogy - dealing with Love, Suicide, Life, Death and Sex. Number 4 will be a tribute - an ode if you like - to words, writing and the worlds you can create and destroy with them. I am actually very excited about every single one of these projects and my goal is to find a publisher for 2-4 - that will of course come later and depend on how well promoted and received 'Love or Suicide...' is.
So for now, have a read below of a cheeky little number from 'Sex' - enjoy!! ;-)
I plan lots of writing, gaming, gyming, sorting out, reading etc for these 2 weeks and I gotta admit, it has been a great start. Today is Wednesday - the 3rd day of my first week of this glorious shutdown...and so far I have managed to look at future writing projects and already begin to gather and start them. I have upped my promotion of my self published book, 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between' by sending a couple of copies out - one to The Samaritans and one to The Writing Magazine. Really looked at my Twitter and Blogger friends and streamlined/added to focus on Authors and like-minded people. I am happily gaming and gyming away - playing Rage on the PS3 and Splinter Cell Conviction on the X-Box whilst spending my early mornings kicking ass in the gym. I am just about to finish a book I have been given by the Managing Director of the company I work for to read, before I start on Fifty Shades Darker - yes, even I have been caught up in all this Fifty Shades bollocks. Gotta say, I have never hated, loved, been intrigued, wanted to burn, sympathised, been shocked, couldn't put down - a book as much as I have with Fifty Shades Of Grey!!! So, like I said - it has been a great start!!
So, a quick teaser for my future projects. At the moment I have 4 on the go (which includes 'Love or Suicide...'), they all follow the same sort of feel and look. The 4 projects are:
1. 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between'
2. 'Life and Death'
3. 'Sex'
4. 'Oh Such Sweet Words' (work in progress title)
The first 3 are my "Existence" trilogy - dealing with Love, Suicide, Life, Death and Sex. Number 4 will be a tribute - an ode if you like - to words, writing and the worlds you can create and destroy with them. I am actually very excited about every single one of these projects and my goal is to find a publisher for 2-4 - that will of course come later and depend on how well promoted and received 'Love or Suicide...' is.
So for now, have a read below of a cheeky little number from 'Sex' - enjoy!! ;-)
The Anticipation
The silent crackling of candles sway in the room,
their light rolling over soft curves lost in lingerie,
there she is; stretched out and alone...waiting,
the sweet smell of anticipation heating the air.
She blushes as the silk babydoll brushes her skin
sending tiny pulses throughout her wanting body
and forcing her eyes shut, her mouth slightly open
and shivers of anticipation down her arched spine.
Almost instinctively, she begins to sway,
her being now independent from her mind
as her hips begin to rock and tighten forwards
and a sudden heat of anticipation builds within.
Her hands want to explore and touch,
her sensitivity wants to spread and expose,
her innocence wants to be gone and be free,
her anticipation wants forever and satisfaction.
Opening her eyes, excitement floods her senses
as she watches herself gorge on tender skin,
naughty sinful thoughts flashing deep inside,
and an anticipation of what's to come.
She knows her man will be home very soon,
she knows it is her night of control,
just the sheer thought sending waves crashing
and her soul drowning in pure anticipation.
The silent crackling of candles sway in the room,
as a rush of air sends them rolling over hot curves,
there she is; no longer alone, no longer waiting,
the sweet smell of anticipation filling the air.
Monday, 30 July 2012
3 weeks...
...it's coming up to 3 weeks now since my first self published book, 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between' has been on sale and I am happy to say any feedback I have had has been very positive. I am gradually promoting it on Twitter, through my Blog and by word of mouth but am planning to step up the promotion throughout August. My thoughts are to have it sell consistently instead of it spiking and then being lost and forgotten - a steady stream of promotion should ensure this.
It is still a bit odd that my true deep and darkest thoughts and feelings are out there for the world to see- basically my heart and soul is on show. In truth, the feedback I have had has been about how open and honest it is and how that makes me feel with that out there. Does it make me feel uncomfortablee? Does it make me feel vulnerable? Of course it does. But it also makes me feel strong and happy that it is out there - like a weight has been lifted.
So, have a look below at some samples of 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between', fire up Amazon, buy a copy then spread the word. Remember, all my profit will be going to The Samaritans.
Dear Dad
It is still a bit odd that my true deep and darkest thoughts and feelings are out there for the world to see- basically my heart and soul is on show. In truth, the feedback I have had has been about how open and honest it is and how that makes me feel with that out there. Does it make me feel uncomfortablee? Does it make me feel vulnerable? Of course it does. But it also makes me feel strong and happy that it is out there - like a weight has been lifted.
So, have a look below at some samples of 'Love or Suicide and the Life in-between', fire up Amazon, buy a copy then spread the word. Remember, all my profit will be going to The Samaritans.
Dear Dad
The dripping alcoholic
The warm liar
The ageing sinner
The abusive man
The dead weight
The piercing fear
The blueprint
Like father, like son
Is this what I am to become?
The haunting
The shouting
The stealing
The anger
The pain
The smell
The blueprint
Like father, like son
Is this what I am to become?
Hate
Spit
Fight
Lost
Self
Destiny
The blueprint
Like father, like son
Is this what I am to become?
Lonely World
I talk to myyyyyyy owN shadow
Laugh ( ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ) AT my OWn jokes
feel for my own feelinGs
TouCH my own SKIN
NO one comFOrTs me wHen I NEed
comforting
no one kiSSes ME wHen I need to BEE
Kissed
NO one ListeNs when IIIIIII neeeeed to beeeee
hEARd
I have no------------------------one Who drEAm’’’’’’s about ME
Or wwwwwwiLLLLLL nOTice
WHHen I am GOne
my heart beats
YeTT TherE is nO one TO TUNE iT
My EYes seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
alllllllllllll………………They SEEEee is mE
I liVEE in THIS world
I have no one who lives with me………LoNEly wORLD…
Saturday, 14 July 2012
Love or Suicide and the Life in-between...
...is finally published!! It has been a while now since I have been on here but I promise to be on here more and more now my book is finally been self-published. Grosvenor House Publishing Limited have done an amazing job with what must have been a difficult task - the layout varied throughout and I was very specific with what I wanted (borderline anal), but it has turned out brilliantly. I am especially happy with the glossy front and back covers of my own designs.
So, what is it about - well:
It's a deeply personal and honest collection of thoughts, poetry and short stories written as a direct response to family fracture and loss attempting to make sense of both subject matters as experienced by myself and fuelled by alcohol and pain.
Basically, I was going through a very hard time in my life and through dangerous levels of drink, I decided to write a book about Love, and about Suicide (subjects which constantly plagued me through this period). It became this 'thing' with its own life, its own mind and its own beating heart and thankfully, it became the vent for all my deepest, darkest thoughts. It isn't a manual on how to commit Suicide or even an ideal view on Love and all its inner trappings and wondrous moments - just a collection of feelings and emotions from a certain section of my life. It is something I am extremely proud of but, strangely, something I don't want to make any money from - so I have decided that any profit I were to make will be donated to The Samaritans.
It isn't an easy read. It isn't perfect and it definitely hasn't been proof read to within an inch of its life. Its there, in your face, spur of the moment feelings - a good 90% of it was written there and then and not touched afterwards, not scrutinised or changed and messed about with. Its raw, honest, ripped from deep within and exposed - exactly what I believe poetry should be!
So please, fire up Amazon, go to the books section and type in 'Love or Suicide and the Life in between' and buy a copy.
Many thanks.
So, what is it about - well:
It's a deeply personal and honest collection of thoughts, poetry and short stories written as a direct response to family fracture and loss attempting to make sense of both subject matters as experienced by myself and fuelled by alcohol and pain.
Basically, I was going through a very hard time in my life and through dangerous levels of drink, I decided to write a book about Love, and about Suicide (subjects which constantly plagued me through this period). It became this 'thing' with its own life, its own mind and its own beating heart and thankfully, it became the vent for all my deepest, darkest thoughts. It isn't a manual on how to commit Suicide or even an ideal view on Love and all its inner trappings and wondrous moments - just a collection of feelings and emotions from a certain section of my life. It is something I am extremely proud of but, strangely, something I don't want to make any money from - so I have decided that any profit I were to make will be donated to The Samaritans.
It isn't an easy read. It isn't perfect and it definitely hasn't been proof read to within an inch of its life. Its there, in your face, spur of the moment feelings - a good 90% of it was written there and then and not touched afterwards, not scrutinised or changed and messed about with. Its raw, honest, ripped from deep within and exposed - exactly what I believe poetry should be!
So please, fire up Amazon, go to the books section and type in 'Love or Suicide and the Life in between' and buy a copy.
Many thanks.
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